We read this Daily Reflection at a meeting Saturday morning, then I read it again this morning in Turkey Bone Heaven’s blog. These words touch me as I realize now how important the brotherhood, or fellowship, is to me today in my recovery. I realize how important people are to me today.
I can see that until now I never truly felt a part of. Throughout my childhood, adulthood, working, playing, even after my very first meeting, I never quite felt truly connected, like an outsider looking in. Why? I guess I wasn’t ready. I guess it wasn’t my time. But something has happened and I do now feel truly connected. Not only to the fellowship and to any and all human beings, but more importantly to myself.
I’m going to have to say this all came from my relapse, a new gift in recovery and sobriety, as I did not have this deep-down gut feeling throughout my first 13+ years of sobriety. This feeling became strong and apparent when I got back into the rooms having stepped away for a few years when I “thought” I was okay with my Big Book and my Higher Power. I didn’t feel lonely at that time. I felt happy and content. But when I walked back into the rooms with my tale between my legs and once again said “I need help”, that was it, it was time, for that true sense of connectivity and brotherhood (or sisterhood, ’twas a women’s meeting). And that fulfilling feeling has not left me sense. I like it. I intend to keep it. I cherish it. I am grateful for it.
With that I am off to that same women’s meeting now, for if I don’t give it away, I know I shall not be able to keep it. If I don’t stay connected to the fellowship and newcomers, I shall drift, back into myself and my head. Don’t want to go there.
With that, have a mighty fine day…until next week…Aloha, Dee.
Thank you, Turkey Bone Heaven, for your most excellent blogs!
For those interested in Inspirational Gifts in Recovery and Hawaii Art, please visit my website at www.DeesignsByHarris.com. Mahalo!