8 THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN GOING THROUGH TOUGH TIMES
Just like us, everything changes. You are still that infant, aren’t you? And that adolescent? That is you, but you have transitioned into who you are today. And who will you be at 3 PM or tomorrow? Change is inevitable. You have no control over it. So make the best of it; thrive from it.
That small town you grew up in isn’t so small anymore. That station wagon you drove around in as a child has transitioned into a hybrid car. That telephone with a dial and attached to the wall with a cord, well, you know the drill.
These are exciting times as we “try” to make the world a better place. Keep on trying; don’t let these changes put you in a negative state of mind. Remember that everything happens for a reason. Make it positive, optimistic, hopeful!
2. You’ve overcome challenges before.
When challenges arise today I am blessed to have a God Box and a Power Greater Than Myself in my life over to whom I can turn my will, my life…and my challenges. This way of living is so comforting for me, knowing that I have no control over people, places, or things, and that everything is happening for a reason. With that I can just go with the flow, being mindful of the present moment, not regretting the past nor worrying about the future.
And, yes, I’ve overcome many a challenge. The greatest being overcoming my alcoholism and being married, raising two boys, and holding down a job in that state of dis-ease. That was a long chapter in my life and I am so very grateful to have started a fresh new chapter. That challenge made me who I am today. Today’s challenges will make me who I am tomorrow. Make it better!
3. It’s a learning experience.
I believe there are no coincidences…that everything happens for a reason. This newly-found Higher Power in my life has a plan for me, a purpose. All for learning and growing. Each person I meet, each occurrence I experience, each thought and feeling I have. All for growing and becoming a better human being. And then sharing those experiences. Important stuff.
And it’s not until my Higher Power says “You may pass GO and collect $200” that I get to be released from my tough times. When the student is ready, the Master appears. No sooner; no later. All perfectly choreographed.
4. Not getting what you want can be a blessing.
My Higher Power knows what’s best for me…what I “need”; my ego knows what it wants…oftentimes not what I “need”. And what I need can feel uncomfortable, chaotic, tumultuous. Yuck! Who wants that?
I didn’t want to go through the discomfort of stopping drinking and learning a new way to live. But I had to. My Higher Power said so. That part of my journey was over. All those decades had brought me to the bottom He saw fit for me to claw out of so that I could now have understanding and clarity, purpose and self-love. Who would have thought? Not in my wildest dreams (I never dreamed nor got good sleep; I passed out and came to) would I ever have thought I would know contentment and peace; to be comfortable in my own skin. That was the plan; I just didn’t know it then.
5. Allow yourself to have some fun.
I remember telling my kids to never let go of their inner child. And I believe that for me, as well. To live our passion and let that child in us come out and play. Love yourself enough, be comfortable enough in your skin to dance as if no one were looking. They’re not looking anyway. And if they are, who gives a shit? If I’m being judged, not my problem, but their’s. Such a better mind-set and way to live. LIVE! HAVE FUN! BE YOU!
6. Being kind to yourself is the best medicine.
This is still hard for me. I’ve always been such a perfectionist and it’s hard to let that character defect go. But I’m trying. Yes, I can love myself for who and what I am with all my unique gifts, just like you have what I want. If it’s meant to be, I’ll get them. If not, move on and be thankful for what I have.
I still feel I am not worthy of having such a good life. When I’m experience chaos-free, peaceful and productive days, I’m waiting for the ball to drop. Why? Because I’m once again living from my head, my ego, and have forgotten to turn my will and my life over to the care of my God of My Own Understanding.
So if I remember to stay in the moment, be grateful, be humble, then I can be kinder to myself knowing that I am perfect right here and now…everything is perfect. I can turn off the Imposter Syndrome that tries to sabotage me. I can allow my positive self-talk to drown out my negative self-talk. Good, yeah? Is that odd, or is that God?
7. Other people’s negativity isn’t worth worrying about.
I have no control over people, places and things and I cannot allow myself, will not allow myself, to let their negativity worry me. Worrying only means that the ego has once again taken over control. Scary place for me.
I choose to live my life in an optimistic, positive, “glass-half-full” mindset. I feel bad for those who don’t, or can’t, and am glad that I am not walking in their shoes. However, I try to put on my empathetic hat to understand why they are the way they are. That helps for me to not judge as I have not walked in their shoes. Again, I get grateful. I get humble.
8. And there is always, always, always something to be thankful for.
Oh, dang. Add a few more “always” onto that statement. To wake up excited each morning for what the day, and my Higher Power has in store for me. That is something to be thankful for. To not “have to” drink today is a miracle in itself. To have a family and a wealth of true friends who love me for who I am, pretty amazing. To be comfortable in my own skin…unreal. To be able to share my experience, strength and hope with rigorous honesty with those I don’t even know, unimaginable. Dang, I am SOOOO thankful!
Thank you for being here on my journey. Please share yours with me. Together we thrive. Alone we die a slow death. Yikes! Don’t go there…
With warmest aloha, Dee Harris
For those interested in what I do when I’m not blogging or vlogging, please visit my shop with inspirational pieces of Art with a Message of Hope and Optimism at www.DeesignsByHarris.com. If you would like to view this blog on YouTube, please visit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7QgOgkjPm0.
Mahalo and enjoy!